Sunday 29 January 2017

Cruel to be kind

Story seed #244 from 400 StorySeeds to Crush Writer's Block Kindle Edition
by M. Kirin
A $1 wedding dress

Yard sales. They were her kryptonite, or maybe more accurately, her catnip. Irresistible.
Cassie could not drive past a sign without taking a quick photo of it for later, or making a note and if there was one on as she drove past, she was stopping no matter where she had to be.
On today, of all days, she should have been able to resist the lure. She was happy, elated, all of the good things. She didn’t need the high that finding a great bargain gave her, but somehow she headed out early and thought she’d just drop in and check the yard sale she had snapped a shot of recently. It was even on the way to the mall where she was meeting her best friend.
She followed the homemade arrows until she could see the faded sun umbrella set up in the front yard. Card tables, a clothes rack, and boxes of yet to be discovered bargains were scattered about.
Clutching her purse in her hand, she picked carefully though a box of paperbacks. Sadly, the only author she knew was for a title she already owned.
The seller eyed her off and flicked cigarette ash into an ashtray. There wasn’t a price tag on the ashtray.
Sidling over to another box, she dug around in it. Her tiki phase was well and truly over otherwise the hula dancing girl would have been perfect.
The seller made a grunt noise. It might have been a question but if it was she had missed it.
She shifted the hangers on the clothes rack and stopped at a garment bag. She unzipped it and peered inside. “What’s this?”
“Wedding dress.”
“Oh my gosh,” she squeaked before she could stop herself. It was too hard to haggle well if she was too eager and the seller knew she wanted something. “My boyfriend asked me to marry him last night.”
The old woman dragged on her cigarette. “Bully for you.”
“Can I open it?”
A shrug she took as permission.
The dress was champagne, not white, but it was perfect. She couldn’t find a stain or a tear or a missing button. No age marks. It was a figure hugging strapless dress, fitted at the front with a train at the back and a short cropped jacket that matched.
She couldn’t guess at it’s age. The style was timeless classic. She also couldn’t see a tag to tell her the size. There were no labels at all. That made sense if it was handmade for a bride. “What size is it?”
“It’ll fit.”
She frowned, but there was nowhere to try it on unless she went inside the woman’s house, and she wasn’t offering.
She hung it back on the rack, carefully zipping it back into the bag before moving on to look at some other items.
Her eyes strayed back to the dress.
Another young woman arrived and she had a moment’s panic that the new girl would steal her dress. Instead, the new customer bought the hula doll and left.
She sighed with relief.
“Did you want it?” The old woman asked.
“The Hula girl?”
“No, the wedding gown.”
“I don’t know...”
“It’s one dollar.”
She stared at the seller. That just couldn’t be right. The garment bag alone was worth more than a dollar. The buttons, the material, and so on. “A... dollar?”
“Yeah.”
She hadn’t agreed but she was already moving over to the clothes rack.
“That’s the deal.”
“Deal?” She stopped.
“You can sell it for a dollar when you’re done.”
She wanted to ask, but didn’t. It felt like rudeness to ask what ‘done’ meant. When you’re married of course. Who needs a second wedding dress?
She and Aaron had been talking about it for years. They lived together but it was always ‘when we’re married’ not ‘if’. He had finally asked her formally last night and that was why she was so happy today.
It seemed like a sign to see the dress of her dreams today.
“Is it a deal?” the seller pressed.
“You have to tell me the real price.”
“One dollar.”
“I’ve got a hundred in cash.” First time she’d tried to haggle someone up.
The woman held her hand up to forestall her. “One dollar; no more, no less.”
“Is there something wrong with it?”
“Do you want the dress or not. I’ve got customers.”
She didn’t. “Fine. A dollar.”
She had to dig in the bottom of her purse but eventually she handed over a crumpled note.
The woman made her shake hands on it as if they really had made a deal.
She hurried over to her car, fearful that the seller would change her mind. She waved at the woman as she drove off.
Her dress. The perfect dress.
At the corner she paused. If she went to the mall and left it in the car, it might get stolen. It would take her fifteen minutes to drop it off at home. She messaged her friend to tell her she’d be a couple of minutes late.
It was hard to carry the long bag. She parked on the street rather than use the garage door, and went in through the front door. She heard voices as the door swung open.
“Where’s your bride?” a husky female asked with a bitter laugh.
“Out,” Aaron said. “We’ve got hours.”
A sound like a smack and then a small yelp.
“Can’t we use the bed?” the woman whined.
“She’ll notice. We fuck on everything else and she’s too stupid to know.”
“Boring,” the woman agreed.
By then, her feet had taken her to the end of the hall, almost without her permission. She knew what they were doing. She didn’t want to see it, but she needed to. And she couldn’t stop. She even knew who he was with. His work colleague Jennifer. The woman he went away with on business trips. A whole lot of small things she had ignored clicked together into a larger, clearer mosaic.
She clutched the dress hanger so hard her fingers went white. A strength came to her. She didn’t know where it came from. She stepped into the room. “Get out of my house.” She didn’t shout. She was loud and clear.
“Shit!” Jennifer said.
“Hey, don’t talk to her like that,” Aaron argued.
“I was talking to you. Get out of my house, Aaron.”
“This is our-” he stopped at the look on her face.
“You told me it was your house,” Jennifer said to Aaron. She had collected her clothes and she held them in a bundle in front of her body.
“You two can have this conversation somewhere else.” Pulling her phone out, she starting looking for a local locksmith.
“I can explain,” Aaron started but she gave him the hand.
She explained her issue to the guy who answered. “One hour? Perfect.”
Jennifer tugged Aaron backwards. He was just staring at her. “Come on,” Jennifer encouraged.
“I’ll be back for my stuff.”
Throwing it out on the lawn would have been fun, but it felt too emotional. Something had changed, or broken inside her.
When she heard the door slam she went to the garage to get some moving boxes. He’d be on her land for less time collecting his stuff if she packed it in a few boxes for him.
*****
A few weeks later after a lot of tears, tequila and bitching with her bff, she remembered the dress. It had been carefully hung in her wardrobe.
She put it in her car and drove back to the house where the yard sale had been. The seller wouldn't want the dress back; they’d made a deal but she went anyway.
A car pulled into the drive as she parked at the kerb.
“Hi!” she chirped at the weary looking man as he pulled a suitcase out of the car. “I bought this at your yard sale.”
He just stared at her. “Sorry?”
“Yard sale.”
“Jet lag.”
“Huh?”
He said, “I’ve been away for a month.”
They both thought of it at the same time. Had he been robbed? He rushed to check, then unlock the front door
“Nothing’s disturbed,” she said as stood inside the entrance. The house looked neat and tidy.
He darted into the rooms and finally emerged looking confused. “A yard sale?” he repeated.
She showed him the shot of the flyer with the address.
“I don’t get it. I’m sorry, can I offer you a drink? All I’ve got is cold beer.” He smiled sheepishly. “After a trip it’s nice to get home and have a beer.”
“Yes.”
The dress hung over the back of a kitchen chair as she told him the story. She apologised for just barging into his home. He made a joke about it being rare.
They opened a second beer.
“So it kind of saved you?” he said.
“I guess. She said, ‘when you’re done’. Is that what she meant? ‘Sell it for a dollar when you’re done.’”
“Was it her dress, do you think?” he asked. “Was she married?”
“I didn’t see anyone with her. If it was her dress, why did she use your house?”
“Maybe it was her house. I’m renting from an agency. Or maybe she lives near here and noticed I was away.” He clinked their beer bottles together. “New promotion means no more travel.”
“Congrats and yay.”
“Is it a nice dress?”
She nodded. “Perfect.”
“Pity.” He reached for the bag but she stopped him.
“It’s bad luck,” she argued.
It was only bad luck for the groom to see the wedding gown, not some random guy she’d just met. But, then again, he wasn’t random. The dress had brought her to him.
“I don’t even know your name,” he complained.
“It’s Cassie.”
“Neil.”
They shook hands and it felt like she'd just made another deal; a better one.
*****
She wore the dress for her wedding and then sold it at their first yard sale. The clothes rack was set up almost exactly where she had stacked the boxes of Aaron’s stuff. Neil moving in had changed the house in so many ways.
It was a different dress by then. (No, it really WAS a different dress. Now it had a pencil skirt.) She was oddly unsurprised by the alterations she’d had nothing to do with. She also felt half sorry, half excited for the young woman wearing retro clothes and red pumps who bought it.
For one dollar, as promised.
She bit her lip as the girl carried it off triumphantly.
Neil kissed Cassie’s hair. “You did the right thing.”
“I know, but I’m worried she’ll be hurt.”
“Cruel to be kind. You never know what comes next.”
“Or who comes next,” she added with a kiss.
~~~~
© AM Gray 2017




Saturday 28 January 2017

New rule for me

This Trump stuff is totally freaking me out.
When kid 1 wakes up, he comes out and asks, ‘damage report’ in his Picard voice. Each time I tell kid 3 the next horrible law that they are passing, she starts singing, ‘oh Canada’.
I get too involved, too upset, too angry… and there’s nowhere for it to go. I kept thinking that someone or something would stop this happening but at each stage the driver-less steam roller continues on. It stresses and depresses me. I do what I can. I have paid dues to organisations that will help where I can’t.
To impose a ban on refugees on Holocaust Memorial day shows an ignorance of history I cannot fathom. The distinct lack of the word ‘Jew’ in the WH release must be deliberate. How could it not be?
I’m Australian, this doesn’t directly affect me; at least until they start the next world war, but I am very worried about my friends and readers in the US. And this will affect the world.
It won’t be solved in days, weeks or even months. I can’t write or work, like this. 
I also know I’m not alone in feeling this way. In the spirit of self-care, I need to focus on something that makes me feel good, and at the moment, that’s my stories. Call it escapism, I know that.
So, for my own mental health I have made a rule for myself: no social media until after 2 pm.
At least it’s socially acceptable to hit the wine cask after I have read a few news stories, freaked out for a while, and got closer to sundown.
Other people have written on this more eloquently than I can.
Links:
My earlier post - people will die
Rachael Herron - we rise
Jim C Hines - Highlights from Trump’s January 25 Interview

Tuesday 24 January 2017

The patron saint of writers

Today is the feast day of Francis de Sales, the patron saint of writers and journalists. A bishop of Geneva, Francis died in 1622.
His most famous work is ‘Introduction to the Devout Life’ and unusually for the time, it was written for laypeople; ordinary people.
I reckon that’s a good sign. The patron saint of writers wrote for everyday people. He encouraged dancing and jokes! The thought that normal people could experience holiness in their daily life was a new idea. You were only supposed to get this if you withdrew from daily life. He wrote his pamphlets and stuffed them under people’s doors.
He persisted until he succeeded.
Maybe that’s the best advice for writers: laugh, dance and keep writing.
Thanks, Francis.